In the midst of all the soul-crushing, mind-pummeling news to which we’re daily subjected, allow me to offer this distraction:

NCAA championship basketball, more affectionately known as March Madness. 🏀 🏆

Now usually, I only keep up with college hoops as it relates to my alma mater, Baylor University. (2021 Men’s National Champion!) But when it comes time for March Madness, it’s hard to not get caught up in the excitement, the unpredictability, the mass hysteria that accompanies this tournament every year.

Speaking of madness, here’s a fun fact:

The tournament always starts on Thursday. On the day before, more vasectomies are performed in the U.S. than on any other day of the year.

Yeah. You heard me right.

Presumably, because it allows guys to stay home a couple of days to recover, giving them a good excuse to watch hoops all day.

Whatever, my fellow dudes. Remember, though, that works only once. (Or should, anyway 😳) You’re much bigger basketball fans than me. And I’m okay with that.

Anyway, back to the games. Yes, my Baylor Bears have already been eliminated from the competition – curse you, Tar Heels! – but that doesn’t mean I’m no longer interested. There are still some compelling storylines to follow. Such as:

Coach K’s Last Dance

Duke University coach Mike Krzyzewski, more commonly known as Coach K (thank goodness), has amassed the most victories of any men’s college hoops coach, going for number 1200 Sunday against Michigan State, in his final season of a legendary career spanning 47 years, 42 of them at Duke. That career includes five national championships and twelve Final Four appearances, the latter of which ties a record.

Naturally, many people would like nothing more than to see Coach K savor the sweet taste of one last triumph as he rides off into the sunset. And yes, that would be a fitting end to a superb career.

But then, what about…

The Cinderella Story

There’s one every year. The team that comes out of nowhere, from a school most of us have never heard of, and single-handedly screws up everybody’s bracket. (If you don’t know what I mean by that, this is clearly not your sport.) But once they show up, they immediately build a nationwide following; people root for them to go as far as they can, maybe even (😱) all the way!!

Ladies and gentlemen, meet the Peacocks of Saint Peter’s University, from Jersey City, New Jersey.

Seeded 15th in the East Regional tournament, they announced their presence spectacularly, shocking Number 2 seed, and perennial powerhouse, University of Kentucky, with an 85-79 overtime victory.

Anybody who saw that coming should have bought a lottery ticket.

The Peacocks then followed that up with an 70-60 win over Murray State, another Kentucky school. (The whole state of Kentucky must hate these guys by now.) Mind you, Murray State came into this game on a 21-game winning streak. No problem for the Peacocks.

The win put Saint Peter’s in the Sweet Sixteen, making them only the third 15-seed team to ever do that. They now await the winner of the Purdue-Texas match.

And if you think this team feels at all intimidated by the bigger schools in its way, I offer the following, soon-to-be-immortal quote from Saint Peter’s head coach, Shaheen Holloway:

“I’m going to say this. It’s going to come off a little crazy. I got guys from New Jersey and New York City. You think we’re scared of anything? You think we’re worried about guys trying to muscle us and tough us out?”

Yeah, attitude!!! In…your…FACE!!

How can you not get behind that, I ask you?

Anyway, I think it’s still worth watching. Maybe now, you will, too. It’s a real good distraction.

Maybe even from a healing vasectomy; I’ll never know.

Oh, and I can still root for the Baylor Women’s team. Go, Lady Bears!